Toddler Tantrums
Managing toddler tantrums might seem impossible, but it can happen with a few tricks and a lot of patience. Emotional outbursts are normal, and every toddler has their moments. By following a few tested guidelines, these tantrums could be diffused quicker than expected.
Sympathizing with children and letting them know that it really is alright to be upset can help immediately. Reasoning with them and validating their feelings make them feel like they are being taken seriously, and even little kids need that sometimes. It is also important to let children explain what is wrong without interrupting, and then take the time to repeat that their feelings are understood.
When regular tantrums turn physical, know that it is normal behavior for children to kick, hit, bite, or throw things. Staying calm is key because they have to know that it is inappropriate. Make room for the child to be alone and let them have a few minutes. If they are determined to be physical, give them pillows and leave them alone for a few minutes – then address the behavior.
Note that when small children get angry or frustrated, these feelings are unknown to them and there is a chance they really are scared. By being there for comfort, children will know that they are safe, emotionally, to release the pent up feelings. Remember, too, that these emotions are not instant – there may be warning signs that a tantrum is going to happen – so distracting them from the matter at hand could change the outcome.
Preventing tantrums can be easier than parents might think. By keeping regular routines, children know what to expect, especially at bed time. If the routine is: take a bath, read a story, and turn out the lights, then that needs to be the routine every night. Changes do affect their emotional equilibrium and can send them off into a tantrum.
Part of routine consists of meal and snack times and nap and bed times. By staying ahead of fatigue and hunger, parents can rule out the two most common causes of tantrums.
Children do not understand the concept of immediacy. It is important that transitions happen with a bit of a warning. By letting them know that play time will be over in three minutes, they will know to start wrapping it up. Whereas they cannot know exactly what three minutes is, they will understand that a transition is taking place.
As they get bigger and want to do everything on their own, a “NO” will most likely be met with a tantrum. Rather than immediately saying ‘no’ or shutting them down completely, provide some assistance on doing whatever it is safely or distract them to an equally ‘fun’ task. It is also important to let them know why the task they were attempting alone was unsafe.
When children have to separate from their parent with a babysitter or grandparent or teacher or whomever, it is important that the child knows that you think they are safe. Leaving them with a smile and a confident hug goodbye will make the transition easier. Rather than peeking around the corner to make sure they are fine, call later to check on them.
Toddler tantrums are unnerving and natural. By taking a few common sense steps – and a few deep breaths – these situations can be diffused fairly quickly and will get easier each time they take place.
Tags: Toddler Tantrums
